Ask ISIS

Love

There are many different kinds of love: There is the love of a parent for their child and a child for his/her parent. There is also the love for a relative and for a best friend and then there is the love that two people share which might have as one of its components sexual love. The entire world loves a lover until the lovers turn out to be the same sex. That last sentence wasn’t correct because men don’t mind that two women are lovers, after all you can see their photos in all the men’s magazines. It is when two men decide that they are in love the horns blare and the laws start being enacted. It would seem to ISIS that if a man were secure in who he was that another’s sexuality wouldn’t impinge on his identity. But we will leave that up to the psych doctors.

Exactly what is love?

Love wants the best for a person. Love respects the object of this love. Love never tries to blackmail the loved one. Love never forces or seduces. Love wants a person to be all that they can be without putting obstacles in the way of those they profess to love. Love never wants everything their own way and never makes a doormat out of their loved one. This of course works both ways. It is as important for others to love you as it is for you to love others. A parent wants to know that their children love them and a child needs to know that their parents love them. Love should never be one sided. Sometimes we are more polite to strangers than we are to our loved ones. Why is that? What can we do to make sure our loved ones are treated like our loved ones and not as an obligation or someone whom we can snap their heads off without fear of reprisals?

How can we become more loving of others? The answer to that question is easier to state then it is to do. To love others you must first love yourself. Do you love yourself? If you don’t then how can you expect others to do so? Do you respect yourself? Do you feel that what you say and do is important? Are you a doormat that those who claim to love you walk on?

You need to learn who and what you are so that when looking in the mirror you can love the person looking back. It is only by accepting yourself that you can then accept and love others.

Do you love yourself? What do you see when YOU look into a mirror?

A Corporate Raider said that being a corporate raider was all he was. He had no time for his wife or his children and love was a word in the dictionary. This became evident when the man became ill and could no longer work. His wife and children had gone on without him. Without a reason for being he became no one and soon passed on. Did his tombstone read: “ I should have worked harder.” Or should it read: “I should have spent more time loving my family.”

A woman had lived for many years with a very controlling husband until one day she found herself a widow. She had been a doormat for so many years that she didn’t know who she was. She knew that she was timid and afraid to think for herself so her first resolution was to find out who she was and then to learn what she was. She needed to learn who and what she was before she could love herself. It wasn’t easy. It is never easy to change. We are programmed first by our parents and then by our associates to think of ourselves in a certain way. Sometimes we are lucky and our parents and associates help us to know who we are and help us to fill our full potential. When this happens we aren’t conflicted and we know that we are loved. Problems come as they do to everyone but when we know who we are and love who we are then these problems can be solved. But when we don’t love ourselves or know who and what we are then life gets to be too much. It is then that problems overwhelm us and we can see no way through, around or over a problem. This is when we take our frustrations out on those we profess to love.

Do you know who you are? What you are? Can you look into the mirror and love the person looking back at you? Think about it for a while. It is up to each person to decide WHO and WHAT they are and then they can love the person in the mirror. Once you love the person in the mirror you are then free to love others.

Always remember that real love is the most important thing in the world. It has nothing to do with sex or race or religion. Real love asks nothing and NEVER wants for the other what is not in their best interest. And if you love yourself and are happy with yourself you will never begrudge another person the right to love.